Why should you start a relationship when you are ready for them, and not when you are lonely?

We divide people into those who have already found this very love, and those who are in search, and in the second we are interested, directly or indirectly, not in their ordinary life, but in the process and the result of the search (“And you often go somewhere ? "," Dating sites tried? "," And the guy about whom you told no longer writes? ", Etc.). From exactly the same position, we see ourselves and find an internal compromise in what is necessary, no doubt, to do something useful for the soul, but we must not forget that you are in search of love and coordinate your actions in accordance to this end.

Why should you start a relationship when you are ready for them, and not when you are lonely?

It turns out that with a sincere desire to just take and fall in love, then at 16, but without stupidity and hysterics (long live the experience!), We fall into an obsession instead of “falling in love”, as the phrase literally translatesFall in love. You might be surprised, but it is this “Actively Searching” status that prevents you from falling in love, because unlike your age of 16, you now keep in mind a specific love pattern and follow it on your heels, as if it were lost car keys in an apartment which can be found if you turn everything upside down. Obsession with a search is what impedes finding an adequate partner. Why is it necessary to stop looking to find if it is about love, and not about the keys to the car?

Loneliness makes us make stupid decisions

Being aware of the prospect of loneliness, we very often reduce the requirements for the person we would like to see together. For example, if we are talking about a banal trip to the exhibition or a joint trip somewhere by car, we analyze that even if the interlocutor does not turn out to be an interesting person, then at least we will have someone to talk to along the way. The same thing happens in a relationship, only this very “road” sometimes lasts for years, and you are all embarrassed to admit to yourself that someone is near boring and even strange.

You miss all the fun, including the most interesting.

Search activity, at best, takes away some of your own time for yourself, and at worst, it prevents you from concentrating on any “non-favorite” goals. You spend time searching for it, but persuade yourself that everyone does this and "this is life." In addition to all the above risks, another, if it’s about acquaintance on the Internet or in special applications, is to stumble upon the same “thirsty in the desert” as you, who have just completed a relationship, but now want to switch quickly and without any special emotions for someone else to relax and forget.

Why should you start a relationship when you are ready for them, and not when you are lonely?

You give yourself away without bargaining

Any comparisons of love with trade unambiguously cause a negative reaction: they say, where there are high feelings, and where there is commodity-money relations. But imagine that the market operates according to the same scheme: the seller needs to quickly sell something, because time is running out (in our case, it’s the same “biological clock”), and he decides to simply lower the price or agree with the offer of the first buyer who aimed to bargain. What happens in a relationship when it comes to such an “express transaction”? Same,as in the market: you persuade yourself that this was the last chance, and forgive a person that you would not forgive without haste (as the seller would not give up at a discount), turn a blind eye to the behavior that would have been outraged before, and allow get the upper hand.

Are you waiting for the moment of meeting love like fireworks

A phrase is spinning in my head with a rather vague sense that when you meet him, you will certainly understand that it is he. And what exactly will happen? A comet will fly over you? Or will he quote your favorite poem from childhood? Or will he say the cherished: "Move to me"? Thus, in anticipation of love, we turn a living person into a certain David Copperfield, who will appear suddenly and will show you magic tricks, although in fact no magic will work unless you realize that you are happy and ready to share this feeling with by others.

Why should you start a relationship when you are ready for them, and not when you are lonely?



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